Like a proper scum, I woke up at noon thirty. I was really worried I was going to be late for the Ladies' Tea in Central London at 3PM. However, by the time I got out of the shower and was ready to leave, I was right on time. Now that day I was to move to a different house with my friend, Maggie aka MaGadamia Nut. I decided the best thing would be to pack my outfits for the dinner, wedding and next day, along with toiletries and leave the rest at Doobs'. This proved to be an excellent idea because once I got to the bus stop, I was very nicely informed by some guy that the bus drivers were on strike. I trotted over to the overground rail station - which was running slower than ever because of the influx of passengers. The young dude and I ended up across the tracks talking about Portugal, Mozambique, London and New York until our respective trains arrived. We bid each other farewell and I rode the train as deep into Central London as I could - hoping to make up some time. It provided futile. All the undergrounds were f'ing packed as hell and late or packed as hell and slow.
I got to the tea at 3:15 - not too shabby - but poor Jaime-san got trapped in the underground and didn't make it until about 4PM. The tea was really beautiful. I met Olivia - she fucking rules. It was great to see Lucy and Mama Flores too. Lots of pictures were taken. PS. You know it's a short group when I'M one of the tallest...
I don't usually have caffeine - so you can imagine how loopy I was after having like 7 cups of tea and a shit ton of scones/sammiches after not having anything in my body at all. I was way more ridiculous than usual and my hands kept shaking when I passed someone something. It was kind of hilarious and kind of embarrassing at the same time...
Olivia is radical because she not only likes silly pictures, she likes to be in them. We liked the look of the old dude up top, obviously.
So, this is where I am so f'ing thankful I didn't bring my other bags with me to the tea/dinner. We all decided to accompany Jaime back to her place, run errands and "pick-up" Dan for the "rehearsal dinner" that started at 8:30. It was 5:30 when we left the tea. Due to the strike, the incredible rush hour and underground fuck-ups, we didn't get to Jaime's until 7:15PM. I had to battle onto every crowded train (and through every crowd) with my duffel bag. It was obnoxious.
I called Maggie to tell her I would be a bit late (we were scheduled to meet outside the restaurant at 8:30PM) but once again, we got hosed by the underground and didn't get there until about 9:00PM. It was annoying and I felt really badly for MaGadamia Nut.
To make matters worse, once we all sat down (there were 40 or so at the dinner), Jaime's dad asked that we all stand one-by-one, introduce ourselves and explain how we knew the lucky couple. Maggie turned to me and said "I'm literally going to kill you." I was cracking up but felt TERRIBLE for my little Souzzle. She basically had to get up and say "Um, I don't know them. Tanya said they said I could come..." She made due with a little joke and it was fine. Maggie referred to herself as my escort for the evening or my +1. So, we started calling each other "Plus." "Ohhh, Plus! I'm so happy we're here together, Plus!" Ha! I like it.
At nearly midnight, Maggie and I rushed on the train to meet up with her fucking awesome friend, Fernanda. We showed up at some bar/club thing - dressed nicely with my bag in tow - and hung out a bit until we got a ride to Fernanda's.
I must say that being American is shit in London (and tons of other places). For some reason everyone thinks it's completely okay to ask you what you think about your govt, your country's policies, your leaders, the election etc as if everything is your fault - and that you not only personally elected George Idiot Bush, but you now have to defend him and yourself.
I started saying in a Southern accent: I got George Bush on mah mind, baby Jesus in mah heart, an' a shotgun in mah hand. These colors don't run!" Shit like that. MaGadamia Nut kept pretending to be in support of McCain. It was kind of funny.
We got to Fernanda's at around 2AM and had to get up the next morning at 6:30AM for the wedding. Yep, we were going to be happy campers in the morning...
-T Money
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